Dating App Fail

It’s summer!, Which means, finally time for lazy days in the sun, family barbeques, and maybe even a quick summer fling. And, did you know that dating apps like tinder and bumble, see the greatest engagement during the winter and summer months?. The simplicity of swiping right or left to easily find that cute lifeguard at the pool, your eighth grade crush, or a handsome stranger can’t be beat!


However, as anyone who has used Tinder and Bumble will tell you, meeting great guys (we’re talking the ones you would bring home to your family) is kind of a joke. With an estimated 50 million people using Tinder per month, and more than 1 billion profile swipes per day, you would think your chances are pretty good. But with hundreds of BuzzFeed, Cosmopolitan, and Huffington Post  articles with titles such as, ‘21 Tinder Messages that’ll make you Cry and Cringe’, ‘My Tinder Bender Date #7’, or ‘18 Tinder Messages that went from 0 to 100, Real Quick’, it’ is clear that Tinder is not a place for those trying to find something more than a casual hookup with the perfect guy. Using Bumble as an example, which only allows girls to initiate conversation with a “match” in an effort to limit sexually explicit or uncomfortable messages, these ‘swipe oriented’ apps remain more a fun game than  real ‘dating’ app.

A newer app, The League, promises to vet  worthy candidates and, according to my tech-savvy friend, is “so much better than Tinder.” She says that guys on The League are more mature and the dating app is more serious. Not to mention, you must apply with your Linkedin profile in order to be accepted — a fact that my high-achieving friend beams at with pride. Dubbed as the ‘Ivy league of dating apps’ there is a waitlist of more than 100,000 potential candidates to be accepted. Once authenticated through linkedin, members of The League are presented with 5 potential matches, selected based on their chosen preferences. As a self proclaimed “modern professional woman,” my friend freaked out when she matched, and started talking with a handsome Stanford grad: “The perfect guy.”.  


After the first date, however The League had failed to fulfill  its promise. After discovering “Mr. Stanford’s” profile on Bumble (which had been recently updated, mind you) with a recently updated profile!) the night before their big date, after months of texting and snapchatting, a red flag had been raised for my dedicated, relationship-seeking friend. On the date, they made small talk over dinner and the perfect League boy walked her home. When the much anticipated “I-had-fun-let’s-do-it-again” text came, she didn’t feel the same way any longer and didn’t know why. This was, after all, her perfect tan, tall, Stanford boy, but somehow he, and their date, had been just ‘fine.’ Upon sending him a response, radio silence on his end followed for a couple of days. Then came the reply, just a little bit rude: “Tell your friends to hit me up on bumble.”


People use dating apps to connect with others, and regardless of whether or not the pool is limited to white collar professionals with even whiter teeth or, well, the rest of us, any “League”– self proclaimed Ivy or not — is bound to be full of some unqualified candidates.

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